Frog and Goat

I just got home and put a bottle of Pacific Rim Riesling in the refrigerator. It speaks to the way the week has been that one of the first things I do when I get home is to line up the booze. I have a bottle of Strongbow open on my desk-really, the best dry cider ever.

A box from Amazon was on the front porch when I got home. The new Harry Potter is finally ours (I’m sure both of us will read it during our August vacation). I’m always excited to see the smiling box even when I’m very much aware of the contents.

In a stunning turn of events, my lunch date canceled and as I was replying to her rescheduling email, I got an email from a friend of mine who said her lunch date canceled and could I meet for lunch. And, she had her car today (a legendary bus rider) so she could come uptown to somewhere near me. We had lunch at Six Burner which continues to be very tasty. She had a pork chop with cheese and jalapeno grits and I had a crab cake sandwich with steak fries. Delicious food and it had been awhile since we’d seen each other. I can’t do justice to our conversation here, but it is nice to see her so taken with her boyfriend. They’ve been going out since Christmas and I think they are having a blast. It’s very nice to see her so happy.

Well, that’s all for now. I hope your weekend is stunning.

So, for years, I taught classes about a software package that a specific population of state workers uses on a daily basis. This week I’ve been observing the new crop of trainers who are now teaching this course. I’m ready to stab myself with my ink pen.
I’m afraid that all of the progress our old training team made with getting good, quality information out to the workers is about to be erased. These new trainers have been on the job for 6 months and I can’t tell if they’ve done one minute of preparation to familiarize themselves with the software program. The trainers have sort-of learned the policy but I’m appalled at the level of comfort with the software program. I should point out each of these trainers were aware of the commitment to teaching software when they applied for and accepted their positions.

My heart is heavy and I’m ready to leave this classroom…obviously, I’ve already left, at least mentally, if I’m writing this in real-time.

I’ve been attending a training class this week in the official capacity of “observer”. My unofficial capacity is to snark about the training with my boss. We just snuck back into training after spending lunch at the beach. In case you hadn’t noticed, it is hotterthanhell outside.

Yesterday we got up, made our nearly world famous breakfast burritos and then went to get haircuts. We were thoroughly entertained by stories from our hairdresser who is originally from Pennington Gap, VA.

After the haircuts we went over to our friends D&J’s and spent all day there. We hung out, drank some mighty fine Sangria and then ate an early dinner. We didn’t leave until after 8pm. We were there from noon to 8pm and on the way home I felt like we’d been on a mini-vacation. You know the kind, friends come in from out of town, you fall into that “catch up on what’s been going on since forever” and you snack and drink and then before you know it, time for bed. Only we weren’t spending the night because they only live across the river so we zipped back home on the toll road which is totally worth the $2 one-way trip because it cuts 15-20 minutes off our trip.

D&J made ribs that were very excellent, baked beans, coleslaw, tomato and cucumber salad, corn on the cob and key lime pie. We actually got to bring home our very own key lime pie. Life is good.

I’m the designated supply person for the office for the month of August. When you are the supply person, you are supposed to buy a month’s worth of paper towels, hand soap (because we’re too delicate to use the stuff building management puts in the dispenser), paper plates, cups, napkins, etc. The coffee club supplies their own supplies related to coffee. I am not a member of the coffee club because I am a coffee snob and refuse to drink coffee that comes in a 5 gallon bucket. Not to mention the little packets of dried cream.

The group I work with is self-described as having too much time and money on their hands and therefore they like to have a little bit of Martha at the office. I’m all for a little bit of Martha at home but at the office? The office is not my home away from home. It is where I go to make money to pay for my real home. It is a means to the end. Therefore I don’t see the point in spending too much money on fancy schmancy paper towels and other products that we use once and throw away. Except for plastic cutlery. I’ll spend a few extra cents for those because I hate having a fork tine break off in my lunch.

Once I had to bring in paper plates for a potluck lunch and I went with Chinet dinner plates. Practically a sin. I figured Chinet would carry me through. These folks expected me to go to the party store and create a theme. Know what? I don’t live anywhere near a party store and I’m not going across town to buy plates and cups to create a theme. Unless, of course, I’m having a group of people over to my house and then I’ll make an effort.

Last night Kroger had a pack of 8 paper towels on sale. I bought them and these folks will have to live with those rolls of paper towels for the month of August. I may get nuts and buy another pack of Chinet plates. Just my passive-aggressive way of rebelling.

The better-half worked on the porch while I was away this past weekend. I was mighty impressed when I got home to see how much he did by himself.

I was one of those kids who didn’t see any point in walking. I had a mean crawl that took me anywhere I wanted to go and I was really good at going places quickly.

My mother told me the story of watching the July 20, 1969 moon landing and how I was standing watching what was going on. She really thought that I was going to take unassisted steps just as Neil Armstrong walked on the moon. What happened was that I just fell down.

Of course, what really happened is history now.

While at the beach on Saturday, I started reading The Writing Life by Ellen Gilchrist. I’ve read nearly everything she’s ever written. Her books take up a shelf and a half on my bookcase…at least they did before we moved. Now, they take up a big box since I haven’t unpacked them yet. I’ve seen her give a reading and I recommend her books to anyone who will listen to me. She’s my favorite.

I chuckled to myself when I read the following:

I am oppposed to professors copying stories and giving them to their studients as it violates copyright laws. I have done it several times with poetry written by people who are dead but I felt bad about it and won’t do it again.

Reading stories that my creative writing professor photo-copied was exactly how I was first introduced to Ellen Gilchrist.

My sister and I got back into town around 6:30 last night and let me tell you those last 100 miles were killer. It seemed like someone was stretching out the highway in front of us as if it were a big elastic band. Also, the rest area at the North Carolina and Virginia border is for crap. It is embarrassing that the Virginia rest area is so very nasty and the one on the other side of the road is so nice. Good job North Carolina.

We did a whole lot of nothing while in Florida and that was very nice. We hung out and talked and ate and turned ourselves pink on the beach. The turning pink thing wasn’t so great but that’s our own damn fault. Saturday night as I was going to sleep I apologized to the skin on my shoulders.

We amused ourselves by going to the Daytona Flea and Farmer’s Market on Sunday afternoon. We could only take about 30 minutes of that much fun and had to go have some lunch. I described the flea market to the better-half “as if a dozen dollar stores exploded”. It was kind of disturbing to see turtles for sale in little boxes. And parrots. Someone was selling parrots and some of the parrots looked like regular size and some were newly hatched and laying in a box together-alive, dead? Who knows. Honestly, I don’t know my birds so they could have been cockatiels or whatever big exotic looking birds are called. I think birds shouldn’t be pets. I think birds in captivity are creepy. The people shuffling around the flea market were kind of creepy too.

I made a couple of CDs for our listening pleasure during the drive to and from FL. Some of my selections cracked me up. I hope my sister isn’t reading this because the surprise will be blown…I’m sure she’ll enjoy the songs anyway.

CD 1:
Willie Nelson-City of New Orleans
Amy Ray-Driver Education
B52s-Roam
Nelson Riddle-Theme from Route 66
Beastie Boys-No Sleep Til Brooklyn
Eurythmics-Sisters are doing it for themselves
Indigo Girls-Chickenman
James Taylor-Country Road
Jerry Reed-Eastbound and Down
Jim Croce-Rapid Roy
John Mayer-Why Georgia
Laura Cantrell-Roll, Truck, Roll
Lucinda Williams-Car Wheels on a Gravel Road
Eric Clapton-Mainline Florida
Michelle Shocked-Memories of East Texas

CD2:
War-Low Rider
Nanci Griffith-Can’t Help But Wonder Where I’m Bound
Chuck Berry-No Particular Place to Go
The Pretenders-Middle of the Road
Sheryl Crow-Steve Mcqueen
Simon & Garfunkel-Baby Driver
Supertramp-Take the Long Way Home
The Beatles-The Long and Winding Road
Todd Snider-Forty-five Miles
Tracy Chapman-Fast Car
Eddie Grant-Electric Avenue
Foghat-Slow Ride