Frog and Goat

This morning I got into the car and found my keys. They were wedged in between the driver’s seat and the center console. I had to wrench them out of there. I think the fabric at the base of the seat had covered them and we missed them in our multiple searches of the car.

The key opens the car door and starts the car. So much for what I thought all that programming and immobilization meant. I figured if the car and keys were reprogrammed the car wouldn’t start with the old key. At least the old key won’t remotely open the car or trunk or set the alarm, but a car thief could have certainly driven the car away.

We moved offices on Monday and it sucks at the new location. For starters it is farther away for nearly all of us. There’s a heating/air conditioning unit on the roof that happens to be right over my office. That thing is loud as hell all morning. Then there’s the constant chit chat, hollering and marching about that goes on there. I do have a door and that’s something I haven’t had in years.

This weekend I’m going to kick my own ass because I have a paper due on the 12th and I’ve done hardly any work on it. I really need to finish it this weekend because next weekend we’re babysitting The Niece all weekend and there won’t be much time for homework.

Speaking of school, I participated in the MEd panel last night. There were four of us talking to a class of undergraduates. I think it went OK. We’re all pretty passionate about what we do and we all have interesting stories to tell about how we got where we are today. The class was a little subdued but the professor reported that there was much conversation after we left.

We went out to dinner last night and a woman changed a kid’s diaper right in the booth. Hi. We’re eating over here.

Yesterday the better-half said he planned on visiting his mother and I said I should put in an appearance as well since it had been awhile since I’d been over there or seen her. So, off we went. There was some sort of accident/slow down/something or other on the interstate and so we had to take the circuitous back way to her house. And it was really quite nice sitting for a good ten minutes watching a loaded down train creep through a crossing. The better-half remarked that when you try to do something nice for the MIL the universe conspires to screw you over. I replied with the old chestnut that no good deed goes unpunished. And, we waited for the train some more.

We got there and she’s having a fit which is something that happens because she doesn’t monitor her medication. And, by fit I mean she’s locked up, mumbly and displaying some serious parkinsonian attributes. One of the women that works for her was there with her two children. The TV was blaring Cory in the House and I spent the rest of the afternoon trying to remember who the actor is who plays the president. He was on SeaQuest.

The house looked like a junk mail bomb went off. Don’t even get me started on the state of the guest bathroom. I’m not really sure what the two hired people do when they are with the MIL. The MIL’s sisters complained about a young woman who worked there for several years and the young woman’s inability to clean–the young woman has left to attend college. I never thought she did a bad job and the house was always reasonably put together. It is now officially a shitstorm over there.

We spent several hours taking care of bills and throwing out junk mail. We had to take two trash bags out to the super can. As I walked through her pantry/laundry room/entry to the garage, I noticed an oldish looking can of evaporated milk. You know how you can tell a can is old? I could tell that just by walking by and when I looked at the date it expired 3 years ago. I quietly put that in the trash. Then on another trip to the garage I found another can that was 2 years past expiration. I really would like some alone time in the pantry.

The MIL has all her mental faculties so taking control of her life is out of the question, even though one of her sisters has suggested the better-half do that. He feels that as long as his mother can make decisions she should make them. I’m sure the sister who suggested that would love to have one of her kids take away her checkbook just because they disagree with how she spends money. And, that sister is just as bad as the MIL, only she has more cash to spend so the quality of the junk she buys is better, but that’s about the only difference. There’s evidently a predisposition in that family to consume, consume, consume.

On the way home from the MIL’s, we stopped by the ABC store and the clerk had to chat us up about the scotch we selected. We’re not big scotch drinkers but we do buy it occasionally, especially when there’s a chill in the air. He wanted to caution us about the peatiness of the scotch and blah, blah, blah, think you can handle it, blah, blah, blah. I just shrugged and gave the better-half a “o good lord” look. Thankfully another customer showed up so the clerk had to hand over the receipt and let us go. The scotch? Jura. It has hardly any peat in it. If you take a sip you can tell that and if you read the literature on it you’d know that. So, yet another person yammering on about something they know nothing about.

Wednesday night the better-half and I went out to dinner to celebrate our first date night. As we were walking back to the car, I was carrying the Styrofoam-to-go box and as we approached the car, I pressed Unlock on my key fob.

We got in the car and I set the to-go box on the floor between my feet. As I set it down, the box popped open and I said, “Man Down”. We chuckled. I fixed the top, we rode home and I talked about how full I was and how we could have the leftover spaghetti for breakfast.

Yesterday afternoon we were leaving for Thanksgiving with friends and I realized my keys were not on the foyer table or in my purse. We looked in the car and couldn’t find them and then I raced back in the house to check my jeans from the previous night. No keys.

When we got home last night I looked in the refrigerator to see if I had put the keys in there when I put the to-go box in there. No keys and seriously wouldn’t we have noticed a set of keys in there?

So, I have no idea where my keys are and my keys are not something I misplace, ever. I have so few places I put my keys and I’m a serious creature of habit when it comes to things like this.

If the keys are really gone, there’s nothing about them that would lead them back to me. So the crazy killers will have to prey on someone else. I carry a minimalist key chain with only 2 car keys and two house-type keys–one of which is the key to my office and it needs to be turned in next week. The key chain has nothing else on it. I just know the cost of a new Honda key is going to piss me off.

Update:
We went by the restaurant to see if anyone turned them in and there are 2 sets of keys in the lost and found but mine are still missing. We also walked along the curb where we parked to see if the keys fell into the gutter but that came up empty too. So, I have an appointment at the dealership on Monday afternoon to have a new key made and programmed and the better-half’s key and the valet key reprogrammed.

Second Update:Total cost almost $166. Ouch.

We’re headed across town to hang out with friends this afternoon. They, very kindly, invited us for Thanksgiving. There are many reasons to be thankful for these friends and one of them is we’re not having turkey.

With that in mind:

The better-half was just talking to his mother on the phone and from the other room the conversation sounded like this:

The other day I ordered three of these so we can unleash the mayhem when we move to the new office in a week. I couldn’t help but order this too:

I have felt like crap since yesterday and today I think I may finally be on the mend. I think, perhaps, there was just too much snot flowing from Lil’ Elvis on Thursday and she infected me with toddler funk. Friday I woke up with a skull-crushing headache that just didn’t go away no matter how many drugs I took. And, last night there was seriously fitful sleep going on. I am on the mend though since Simon curled up with me on the couch this afternoon for a nap. You know there’s nothing like the healing powers of a fluffy cat.

I had planned on getting started on two projects I have due at the end of the semester but laying on the couch won out. I just checked my work/school email to see if my professor had emailed comments back on a worksheet that’s going to guide my work on one of the projects. She hadn’t but the professor who heads up my program emailed me and asked me to sit on a panel to talk about careers in HRD (human resources development) in one of her undergraduate classes. Holy crap, think I should leave out the part about trying to drive co-workers mad?

Since most people find themselves with their eyes closed in photos, I decided to just skip right to that mode when taking a picture of my new glasses.

It also means I’m still anonymous.

I took the day off to spend it with one of my nieces–the niece I’ve been calling Lil’ Elvis. I was thinking today that I’d have to come up with another nickname for her but on second thought I think Lil’ Elvis she’ll be. I played some CDs already in the player at my sister’s and then moved on to public radio.

Lil’ Elvis was amused when I was dancing to one of the CDs that played but then she got the beat, the beat, the beat, beat, beat, while listening to some classical music. The kid already has a pretty good sense of rhythm. So, Lil’ Elvis she shall be because she can jiggle that leg to the classics. And, seriously Bach, Haydn and Mozart can rock out with the best of them.

Lil’ Elvis and I have a date on Thursday too. I hope she’s not the pooping machine she was today. I’m glad I have a strong stomach. It’s been a family joke about how her sister has never failed to toot on me–she once let it rip on my bare arm and the last time she spent the night there was a ripper right in my face–her butt was an inch away from my face. It’s a good thing I like them so much.

Simon gained 2 pounds in two weeks and the vet was pretty pleased. He can gain 4 more pounds and then needs to maintain that weight.

On the whole the cat is becoming more comfortable with his surroundings but there have been a few minor behavior issues we need to work on. It certainly helps that he loves to snuggle and is an equal opportunity snuggler and will go from one of us to the other to make sure we both get the Simon-lovin’.

My sister and her girls are coming over for supper today. I hope Simon comes out to see everyone or they may start to think we’re just pretending that there’s a cat living here.